The problem of how to get your ex back, in an ordinary situation, is a difficult one to find a solution to. Decades ago, this may have been even more so when you are in a long distance relationship. Fortunately, the rise of the internet and the innovations in technology has allowed couples of this day and age more chance at long distance reconciliation. Keep in mind though that it takes more than a few online video calls to get your ex back.
Desperate attempts to get your ex back can backfire on you. Calling or e-mailing your ex persistently isn’t going to bring back your relationship. You’ll only appear desperate and two-minded. What you need to do now is take a deep breath and reflect. Can you truly turn this breakup around? To find the answer to that, you must look back. How was your relationship?
Remember how it was first like not being able to physically get in touch with your ex. You should consider whether both of you ever talked about how you would handle the distance. If you weren’t totally ready for the physical absence, perhaps this could have had a large influence on your breakup. There’s a cut-off point where couples will be able to handle the relationship normally if they’ve been apart, and that is typically four months. So if you think physical absence was the main problem, you could agree to see each other at least every four months or less if possible.
Then there’s the trust issue. How trustworthy were you with each other? Find out why there was even a trust issue. Were there really some things that made you lose trust or was it all just insecurity? If you had trust issues with no good reason, the best way would be to apologize. On the other hand, if it was truly the other person who lost your trust, then the best way would be to forgive that person. After all, you still want to patch up despite everything that’s happened.
When you have figured out what went wrong, the next thing to do is to let the dust settle and disappear. This might sound contradicting, but it gives not only time for the emotional dust to settle, but it also makes your ex think about you. When you were far apart, your ex depended on you every single day for encouragement and support. The sudden unplugging of this support will make your ex rethink whether the breakup was really necessary.
Once you’ve had enough alone time, call your ex. Remember you’re far apart and you just want to check how your ex is doing. Don’t make it sound like you’re begging. What you want to do now is address the past issue, apologize, and forgive (refer to earlier advice). While it will sound like you’re attempting “closure,” what you’re really doing is putting away the hard feelings so it’s easier to patch up.
Once you’ve achieved all that, you can then go light on the conversation and subtlety bring up things that remind your ex of all the positive experiences you’ve had together. Even if your ex has temporarily switched to someone who’s conveniently around, that relationship does not necessarily have the depth that yours had.
And your final move? Suggest an action plan on how to better deal with the distance. Having an action plan ready will show him/her that you really do care and that this relationship is your priority. Ask the person what he/she thinks, and start from there.
How can I get my ex back? Get answers to this question. Discover practical tips and solutions on how to get your ex girlfriend back. This article, How To Get Your Ex Back: Dealing With Distance has free reprint rights.
